The Coach Who Believed in You: Why the Hardest Voice in the Room Is Usually the One That Matters Most

On our latest episode of The DSC Podcast, (DSC PODCAST LINK), Jake and I got into a conversation about the fitness influences who shaped us.

We both landed on the same kind of person: a coach (and my Dad).

Jake’s Coach

Jake told a story about his high school coach, who was always on him. He never seemed to miss anything Jake tried to shortcut or could do better. As a teenager, that kind of attention can feel like a spotlight.

One day, Jake said something to him about it. And his coach looked at him and said, essentially:

“Jake, the reason I’m on you all the time is because I believe in you. The day I stop talking to you? That’s the day you should be worried.”

That line has stuck with Jake for years. It reframes something many of us get wrong. We assume the loudest voice is the harshest voice. But often, the loudest voice is the one that sees the most in you. That’s exactly how I think about our Coaches. I ask a lot out of them, but it’s because I know what they are capable of.

Coach Martin

For me, it was Coach Martin.

She taught me how to work hard. How to put my head down and run, no matter how tired I was, no matter what the scoreboard said. The moment that shaped me most was during a preseason scrimmage.

I was on the team that was probably going to lose. Less talent, less firepower on paper. Somewhere in the middle of the game, Coach Martin called me over and told me to switch my penny to the other team, the stronger one.

As I jogged past her, I said something like, “Oh cool, now I’m going to be on the winning team.”

She stopped me.

“Daria, get back on that team. You are the person who makes your team a winning team. So get back over there and work harder.” I was immediately ashamed of my attitude because I knew she was right and my thinking around winning was wrong. That was a lesson that stuck.

I’ve thought about that moment more times than I can count. What she was telling me was “our presence changes the outcome“. Your work ethic, your attitude, your effort, they don’t just help you. They lift everyone around you.

The Infamous (to me only) Bike Ride to Charleston

There’s one more story I’d like to share because it’s one that has made me who I am.

My dad was an endurance athlete before that was a thing. Before Ironman was a household word. Before Strava. Before podcasts about zone two training. He was a Maine state trooper and a father of four, and he would just, go. Marathon distances around the neighborhood, not a registered race or anything like that. Just very long runs. That was his stress relief, and his meditation. He once rode his bike from our house in Maine to Nova Scotia. And back (not including the Ferry).

I watched him do this for years and of course that had an impact.

The gift came the day he invited me on a bike ride.

I was in sixth grade and he asked me to ride with him from our house to the town of Charleston and back, three towns over, in Eastern Maine, with real elevation. One water bottle. No food. I was on a three-speed road bike I had saved for and bought myself. Flat pedals, no clips. I cannot imagine doing that ride today without clipless pedals.

I knew I could do it. He knew I could do it.

Then we hit Charleston Hill… and I didn’t know if I could do it, lol.

If you know Eastern Maine, you know. Halfway up, everything hurt. My legs, my lungs, my hands on the bars.

Obviously I made it. We made it.

Somebody, not my mom, sorry mom, I cropped you out, snapped a photo that day. There aren’t a lot of pictures of me as a kid, but there’s that one. And that photo represents the day I learned two things I’ve carried into every hard thing I’ve done since:

1. I can do really hard things.
2. There is a gratification, a reward, a confidence that only shows up on the other side of suffering when you had to reach down and find something.

It’s funny because my Dad wasn’t one to give pep talks or tell me I was strong. He just helped my find that on my owne by inviting me along.

The Next Hard Thing

That day on the bike started something in me that never really turned off.

For most of my adult life, endurance sports were how I kept feeding it. Running through Maine and New Hampshire winters when the roads were sheets of ice. Swimming in cold oceans, through hiking the Appalacian Trail. Piling on the miles, bike, pool, road, hike. The discomfort was the point. It was how I stayed in conversation with the version of myself I met on Charleston Hill. It’s what helped me find the joy and gratitude for the moments we have comfort. Like the shower after 5 days of hiking and sleeping in the woods. Or like the nap after a 20 mile long run on Sunday. If you just do the nap or the shower without the suffering, it just doesn’t hit in the same way. You don’t understand how awesome those moments of comfort really are.

Then I became a business owner, and that became the hard thing. Building DSC, hiring the best coaches in the industry, paying them what they deserve, refusing to compromise on programming or safety, that consumed the discomfort quota for years. Entrepreneurship is a marathon nobody trained me for. Somewhere along the way, I got comfortable. Not comfortable comfortable, entrepreneurs never get that, but competent. And the second I noticed that, I knew I needed something else to chase.

I’ve tried to get back into triathlon. But between the business, the family, the schedule, the pool logistics, I just haven’t been able to make it work in this season of life.

And then Hyrox found me.

Why I Fell for Hyrox Training

Hyrox training is accessible for me in a way triathlon just isn’t right now. Eight strength stations between one-kilometer runs. It maps cleanly onto the strength and conditioning I’m already doing every day, next to the people I already love training with. Running is the most accessible sport on Earth, you need shoes and a door. And when I want more volume without more pounding, I hop on the bike, steady state or intervals.

That’s the beauty of Hyrox training. You don’t have to abandon the community and the coaching you already trust. You layer a new goal on top of it.

For the first time in a while, I’m uncomfortable again. In the good way. In the Charleston Hill way. There is a goal on the calendar that I am not certain I can hit, and that is exactly what I’ve been missing.

If you’ve been reading this whole thing nodding along because you know you need another hard thing in your life, I want to invite you into ours.

Why This Matters for Your Fitness Journey

Here me now and listen later (who knows where that quote comes from?) Especially for those of you who’ve been standing at our door, in your car in the parking lot, or driving by, or on our website with the tab open for three weeks:

The right coach doesn’t leave you alone. The right coach pays attention. The right coach cues you, corrects you, cheers for you, modifies for your bad shoulder, remembers your kid was sick last week, and pushes you to try the harder progression because they can see something in you that you can’t see yet. The right coach doesn’t hand you the easy road. They invite you onto the road you didn’t think you could ride.

That’s what our DSC Coaches do. Every single session. It’s not a vibe, it’s a standard (and a vibe, let’s be honest).

And the second lesson, Coach Martin’s lesson, is just as important:

You are the person who makes your team a winning team.

When you walk into our gym, you aren’t stepping into a room where you have to prove you belong. You’re stepping into a room that becomes better because you’re in it. The person next to you, maybe he’s battling his own stress, her own injury, their own busy season of life, they need your presence. They need to see you show up.

You are not the weak link. You are the reason someone else pushes a little harder today.

The Voice You’re Looking For

If you’re stuck right now, tired, overwhelmed, sandwiched between kids and aging parents, trying to fit yourself in somewhere at the bottom of the list, ask yourself two things:

Whose voice is in your head telling you to keep going?

And when’s the last time somebody invited you to do something hard, just because they believed you could?

If the answer is no one, that’s the gap we fill. Not with someone yelling at you. With someone who sees you, believes in you, and stays on you because of it.

That’s what coaching is. That’s what our coaches were trained to do. That’s why our members keep showing up, year after year, award after award.

And the day we stop Coaching you? That’s the day you should be worried.

But that day isn’t coming.

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Ready to find your Coach Martin? Come try a session. We’ll meet you exactly where you are, and we’ll believe in where you’re going.

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P.S. If you want your Charleston Hill, here it is.

We have three ways to put a hard thing on your calendar right now:

1. DSC Hyrox Small Group Training Periodized Hyrox training built around the Boston Hyrox event. Coached, community-driven, and designed to get you race-ready whether it’s your first Hyrox or your fastest. If you have a bid for Boston, this is your home base. If you don’t, keep reading.

[For More Info on Hyrox Training Camp starting July 20th, click ➡️ https://go.dynamicsc.com/hyroxtrainingcamp]

2. DSC Half Hyrox Simulation, August 16th Not going to Boston? We’re bringing the race to you. A full half-Hyrox simulation event at DSC in August, same format, same standards, same finish-line feeling.

[August 16th, start time 0700 – waive times tbd, $95, ➡️ registration link.]

3. DSC Full Hyrox Simulation The full 8-station, 8-kilometer test. For the people who want the whole thing.

[Save the date Oct 25]

PS You don’t have to be fast. You don’t have to be sure. Grab your FREE NO SWEAT INTRO